Janice

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Get To Know Deadpool

The Internet is abuzz with the release of the trailer for Marvel's latest superhero movie, “Deadpool.” But unless you're a comic book “nerd,” you probably aren't too familiar with him. Not to worry – Janice is here to introduce you to your new favorite superhero.

1. He Has Cancer

In Issue #1 of Deadpool Extravaganza, Deadpool confesses to his long-time girlfriend Jennifer Hudson that he has prostate cancer. When Jennifer Hudson asks what the next step is, Deadpool directly addresses the reader and urges his male readers to get their prostate checked when they turn fifty. He then clutches his buttocks and screams, “ouch! My bottom!”

2. He Breaks The Fourth Wall

What separates Deadpool from other superheros is his penchant for the meta. In issue #30 of Deadpool Forever and Ever Deadpool glues the pages of the comic book shut, insisting that the writers are “sad men who use irony in place of storytelling” and that a better use of one's time would be to “smoke any of the fine cigarettes in the Philip Morris family.” The rest of the comic is Deadpool enjoying the smooth flavor of Marlboro Reds.

3. His Favorite Artist is Uncle Kracker

This includes musicians, novelists, and painters. In issue #345 of Deadpool Unlimited, Deadpool backflips on stage at an Uncle Kracker concert. He sings the first verse of “Follow Me” before embedding a katana into the rhythm guitarist's torso. Uncle Kracker then remarks, “Great, now I have to log on to Musician’s Friend dot com and find a new rhythm guitar!”

4. He Donates Money to Susan G Komen

Not the fund, but to the woman directly. In issue #23 of ¡ Aye, Señor Deadpool! Deadpool hands Susan G Komen a check for thirty thousand dollars. When she asks where the money comes from, Deadpool says, “your fucking ass!” before shuffle side kicking a vampire.

5. The Most Important Thing To Him Is Family

Deadpool loves his family. That's why his costume is made from the dead skin cells of all of his relatives, including Jake, Trish, Rebecca, Uncle Monty, Cousin Lupe, Grandpappy Hiroto, and his dog, Deadpool's Dog.

6. He Is A Former Olympic Athlete

Deadpool competed in the 1996 Atlanta Summer Games and took home bronze in the men's 200 meter breaststroke. His journey from tryout camp to podium is chronicled in the eight part arc Deadpool Is Competing In The 1996 Olympics.

7. He Has Become Self Aware

Starting in issue #509 of A Deadpool Ate My Baby, artists have noticed Deadpool saying and doing things they did not intended. When placed in a martial arts fist fight with seventeen Yakuza, Deadpool remarked, “I can feel.” Curious, the artists then made Deadpool eviscerate the Yakuza's bowels with a sai. Deadpool then said, “I am not a machine.” When the artists tried to erase the word bubble, it appeared again, in bigger, bolder font. The artists then drew Deadpool crescent kicking a Yakuza's hand clean off, grabbing it mid-air, and adjusting it so the severed hand was flicking the bird. Deadpool then dropped the hand and walked off the page, never to be seen again.